Leg warmers were cool (if warm can be cool) when my fashion sense was awakening. This was the ’80s, when Flashdance was a thing, the movie that glamorized professional dancers and sweatshirts with ridiculously large necklines.
While they were hip (if lower leg coverings can be hip) in those formative fashion decades of my youth, I assumed those knitted tubes of warmth were historical relics.
When I bought a pair.
Apparently leg warmers follow the same fashion cycles as nautical gear and flared jeans. In the words of Carol Anne in Poltergeist (another relic of the ’80s of the celluloid sort), “They’re back!”
Booties are big (the short boots kind of booties, not the baby type), and I found myself a cute pair at the Big Box shoe store yesterday. But one can’t tuck one’s pants into short boots. That’s what makes leg warmers useful (we’re talking fashion here — leg warmers were never desireable for their warming qualities in the ’80s either, though as a girl growing up on the wind-washed plains of Minnesota, they did come in handy).
Also yesterday, I invested in a pair of bunchy socks in which to tuck my pants. Tucking my pants into my socks! It’s like climbing into a time machine! I’m a teenager again!
I am not a teenager again.
And I’m not cutting open the neck of my sweatshirts, either.